The fear of being alone is greater in some people than others. This not only applies to friends, but to someone close whom you could never really part with. I have this fear, and this fear is generated by the fear of not being able to get over someone if they do not want me anymore.

Previously, I was talking about the small things. The small things in life count too, that's what I said. The thing about this is that I have already done so many small things to keep my relationship with someone strong. If I ever lose her, those things that I did would seem very... unoriginal if I did them on someone else. The way I think is that this little lady of mine will be with me for keeps. There will be no one else for the rest of my life. I know if I ever lose her, I will probably take a very, very long time to get over it. Not only that, the next time I think about doing those small things again, I would not think it was something original, thus fucking up the intent and the feeling that I put into that small thing. You may not understand.

I always think about the small ways I can keep life interesting for the both of us. Somehow I know that if this relationship doesn't work out, I'd find it extremely hard to have an interest in someone else. I am not the type of person who can just change from girl to girl. Most of you who know me know that I think very differently when it comes to certain things. This would be one of them. Jumping into relationships is not something I do.

Bah whatever, I've lost my train of thought.